There are so many poems, stories and songs that bring a smile to your face and joy to your heart. Why is it the holidays seem to be the most stressful time of year?
We do it to ourselves and then resent others because we acquiesce and do what we feel we must do. We allow others to dictate where we go, how we celebrate and with whom and then we are too tired and frustrated to speak up and say what we would like to make our holiday easy, quiet, calm, fun, entertaining, joyful, whatever you and yours want it to be.
Make this your year. What are traditions anyway? Someone started them. But no one set them in stone. Make your own traditions. Start with your immediate family. Is that you and your spouse? Is it you, your spouse and your children? What do you, as a family, want to do? Take a survey and make your own traditions around those results.
You may find that your child thinks the holidays wouldn’t be the same without candy canes on a Christmas tree or perhaps singing songs after lighting the menorah. Maybe the holiday dinner won’t be complete for your spouse without creamed onions, or that special cranberry relish that Aunt Anne made every year.
Most of the time, it’s the little things that make the difference. We go for the big things thinking we have to do it all, and not just do it all, but do it all flawlessly. Those are impossible goals – and those high standards, that we place upon ourselves, cause nothing but stress, anxiety and resentment.
Be the one to broach the changes. As adults, maybe exchanging gifts is something that is difficult for everyone. Financially, it can be a strain. Mentally, it can be beyond stressful. As we move away from the nucleus of the family in which we are brought up, we change. Our tastes change. We are no longer the little child we once were – especially if we didn’t speak up when we were a child and just went along with the flow to keep peace and not hurt anyone's feelings. In that case, maybe no one really knew who you were to begin with so they couldn’t possibly know you now.
Have a conversation about the changes you want to make. You may see, or hear, relief from the person you are speaking with. It’s amazing how a few kind and simple words can make new traditions that work for everyone.
Give a real gift this year; the gift of time, peace and calm. You’ll never know what your traditions are until you get them started. For yourself. Start a tradition of giving of yourself, to yourself. It’s only in the giving of ourselves, by taking care of ourselves, that we can then give to others.
Intending you and yours a very Happy Holiday!
We do it to ourselves and then resent others because we acquiesce and do what we feel we must do. We allow others to dictate where we go, how we celebrate and with whom and then we are too tired and frustrated to speak up and say what we would like to make our holiday easy, quiet, calm, fun, entertaining, joyful, whatever you and yours want it to be.
Make this your year. What are traditions anyway? Someone started them. But no one set them in stone. Make your own traditions. Start with your immediate family. Is that you and your spouse? Is it you, your spouse and your children? What do you, as a family, want to do? Take a survey and make your own traditions around those results.
You may find that your child thinks the holidays wouldn’t be the same without candy canes on a Christmas tree or perhaps singing songs after lighting the menorah. Maybe the holiday dinner won’t be complete for your spouse without creamed onions, or that special cranberry relish that Aunt Anne made every year.
Most of the time, it’s the little things that make the difference. We go for the big things thinking we have to do it all, and not just do it all, but do it all flawlessly. Those are impossible goals – and those high standards, that we place upon ourselves, cause nothing but stress, anxiety and resentment.
Be the one to broach the changes. As adults, maybe exchanging gifts is something that is difficult for everyone. Financially, it can be a strain. Mentally, it can be beyond stressful. As we move away from the nucleus of the family in which we are brought up, we change. Our tastes change. We are no longer the little child we once were – especially if we didn’t speak up when we were a child and just went along with the flow to keep peace and not hurt anyone's feelings. In that case, maybe no one really knew who you were to begin with so they couldn’t possibly know you now.
Have a conversation about the changes you want to make. You may see, or hear, relief from the person you are speaking with. It’s amazing how a few kind and simple words can make new traditions that work for everyone.
Give a real gift this year; the gift of time, peace and calm. You’ll never know what your traditions are until you get them started. For yourself. Start a tradition of giving of yourself, to yourself. It’s only in the giving of ourselves, by taking care of ourselves, that we can then give to others.
Intending you and yours a very Happy Holiday!
Copyright 2009. T Love. All Rights Reserved.
Wow, you are so insightful. Listen, speak up and enjoy. Such wonderful advise. I will stop the rushing and enjoy "my time" with the people that matter.
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